2 Months After Moving

So, we have been here almost 2 months now. I have already made my way back to Idaho (10 hour drive) by myself and the boys about 3 weeks after we got here. Things are settling in nice and we are back to a schedule.

Sunday's are always busy with church in the morning and Sunday School. Both the boys go to the nursery for church and then Alden is able to go to the pre-school Sunday School. Lyndon stays with the high school Sunday School and I am in a young adults Sunday school class. I am really enjoying the fellowship and teachings each week.

Every other week there is a Mommy Play Group at the park. I have been there when there is just two of us and when there is 8 moms and the playground is filled with kids. It has been really good for my boys to make friends their own age.

On Wednesdays, Lyndon and I have opened up our house to the youth group. Last week was our first week. I am planning on making a meal each week for them and Lyndon will do a lesson and games. Last Wednesday, we had 3 boys show up. This week, we have more promising to come.

Lyndon has Fridays and Saturdays off so Thursday is really our Friday. We have been enjoying the time together as a family. I have been making 3 hot meals a day and we have been able to sit at the table for dinner most nights.

Throughout the last couple months I have found things that have helped me after moving and things that have hindered me. I had a hard time after I moved because I left my whole family behind. My kids left ALL their cousins and I left seriously, my whole family. They were the people I was able to fall back on when I was having a bad day, besides my husband. Here are some things I have found that made the move worse...

#1. Being alone.

The first few weeks after we moved I didn't want to be here. I didn't go to the store unless I had to, I didn't talk to anyone unless I absolutely had to, and I cooped up in my house with my kids and I completely isolated myself. I started getting pretty depressed. However, I had someone from our church faithfully come by the house on a weekly basis just to talk. More on that later. Anyway- one of the worst things to do, be alone.

#2. Don't express my feelings.

I was hurting and I didn't want to tell anyone. Whenever I talked to people for the first few weeks, I had a smile on my face saying, 'yes! I love the area. We are really enjoying being here.' When I really wanted to say, 'I want to go home.' About a month in, I was able to open up and express how I felt to people and it truly helped.

There wasn't too much that hurt the process after the move. I actually did try pretty hard to do the right thing for the kids and me. Things that I found helped:

#1.

Find a good church family.

This is probably pretty obvious for us because Lyndon's job IS the church. But, the first thing you want to do is find a good church family that you can rely on. It is very important to find a community of people that believe the same thing you do. You will connect with people so much faster and find friends with common interests.

#2. Find someone to talk to.

This is hard. But, it is much easier if you do #1. Find someone within the first couple weeks of moving that you feel comfortable talking to and invite them over. I didn't even have to invite the person that I talked to, I think she knew I just would never ask and said, "What are you doing Monday? Can I come over and talk?" She came and we talked for hours. She has faithfully came to the house every week and I have been able to talk to her about things that I can't talk to just anyone about. Definitely find someone you can confide in and someone who can mentor you. The nice thing about the person I found is that she has lived here her whole life and knows everything about the town and makes me feel like family.

#3. Find a group with common interests with you and go to the group "Meeting":

I really didn't know how to title this. This is like a Sunday School class, a craft group, a women's group, a group of moms that goes to soccer games with your kids, etc. Just find a group that you can connect with. Mine was the Mom's Play Group. Every other Tuesday we go to the park and the kids play together. The first week was awkward. I didn't know anyone and everyone knew each other and what was going on in their lives. But, I was able to connect with a few moms, get their numbers, and talk about our lives. I was able to find a good preschool for Alden next year, even!

#4. Tour The Town.

There is no worse feeling than being asked to go somewhere and not know where you are going. Lyndon and I would get in the car in the evenings and learn the town. The basics at first. Grocery store, Library, Post Office, Church, Bank. Then, we did other like church members houses, different ways to get to the church, City Hall, different restaurants, etc. It helped a lot.

There are probably more things that help, but those seemed to be my big ones. If I think of more, I will definitely add them on a later post. Short story long (haha) in the last 2 months I have definitely grown as a woman, a mother, and a Christian with this move. It's easy to say "I rely on God" when you have everything together. When you are hurting, lonely, and scared... "Relying" has a whole different meaning. I knew I would survive, and I am definitely feeling much better about it all.

As a stay-at-home mom, I can definitely seclude myself from the world and shut everything else off outside my house. Not smart. Get out there, meet people, find a good church family, and connect. You will definitely feel better!